ROFLMAO!!!

^-^;;
OMG! I just refound the best page! http://malkav.freeshell.org/fun/ !!!
Specialy some of this stuff here... http://malkav.freeshell.org/fun/wod/index.html

ROFLMAO! http://malkav.freeshell.org/fun/random/pickup.txt

Or as seen on http://malkav.freeshell.org/fun/random/madphone.txt
RING . . .
RING . . .
CLICK

"Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline."

If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 - repeatedly.

If you are codependent, please ask someone to press 2.

If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want.
Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell
you which number to press.

If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press. No
one will answer.

If you are delusional and occasionally hallucinate, please be aware that
the thing you are holding on the side of your head is alive and about to
bite off your ear.

*Laugh, gasp, snicker, wheeze... giggle*

Tee Hee! Lightbulb jokes! http://malkav.freeshell.org/fun/wod/jokes2.txt

How many _ does it take to change a light bulb?

Malkavians: 5 to hold the Giraffe and one to fill the bathtub with brightly
colored machine tools.
or: 200 - One to hold the light bulb, and 199 to rotate the house to screw it in.
or: "It's MY bulb! I took it, it spoke to me, and it's MINE!"
or: "Which one?"
or: Just one, but the bulb might refuse to shine afterwards.
or: Just one, but it will be put in sideways.
or: (Word Eater was here)

Ravnos: "Light bulb? What light bulb?"

Tremere: None ("You will change my lightbulb" `I will change your lightbulb...'
"You will forget you ever saw me" `I will forget I ever saw you...'

And of course, oodles more on those pages! *snicker, giggle*